05 August 2012

forward.

as you all may have noticed (all 3 of you - that's being generous) or you may have not noticed, but i have taken a bit of a hiatus.

i needed a break. a break to figure out everything.

what exactly is everything is neither here nor there. but it meant that everything took a backseat. and i mean everything.

running took a big hit.

i had a vicious head cold and took that as a sign that maybe i should scale back my life and start over.

i've been having a lot of hip problems and lower back problems. so i decided to take a bit off and stretch and strengthen. and honestly those have take a bit of  back seat as well.

with all that being said i am still running the half in october and the full in december.

i want to feel like a real runner. i know i AM a real runner, but i want to FEEL it. i've got the shoes, the shorts, the scars, the medals, even the times to prove to those around me that i am. i know for sure i have the heart, i just need to get my head back in the game and prove it to myself once again.

working three jobs has set me back a bit.

i love them all and am eternally grateful for them, but i am exhausted. i shouldn't complain because people have it much worse than i ever will, but some days it's all i can do to come home and put on pajamas before i fall asleep. i am lucky to eat dinner.

take today for instance. i worked. yesterday was my only day off this week. i came home and immediately fell asleep. i ate three plums for dinner. i'm just not hungry these days. or maybe i am, but nothing seems to satisfy what i want to eat.

i promise going forward from this day, sunday august 5th, i will make a concerted effort to have fun in all things.

i am slowly getting the life fun back on track, but i need to get running back.

i miss it. i do not regret taking a step back. sometimes you need to take a step back.

now is time to go forward.